Monday, May 5, 2014

This Blog Still Exists

Hello to all in the blog world. What an absence I have been on. There isn't a legitimate reason for having stayed away from writing on this blog except for a lack of effort on my part. If this post reaches anyone still interested in following, I appreciate you.

So why the need to revisit this blog...two years ago when I started this blog, I was convinced it would be my "platform" for something, I just wasn't aware of what. Over the course of these past two years, I have grown as a writer and as a believer. With this growth comes maturity and a clearer sense of what this "platform" should be about.

I used to obsess over who I could reach and what I could say and what I could do and what I could create, etc, etc, etc. I was very much a leaf tossed in the wind from one direction to the next. The direction of the winds lead me down various paths and have brought me back to square one, which I had avoided at all costs.

So what is square one you ask? In two words it is AUTISM and FAITH. In 2010 I received a call that turned my world upside down. A call to tell me my oldest son, Arron, displayed autistic characteristics. I would spend the next several months in denial and a state of depression, followed by anger and finally acceptance. My greatest fear was that by accepting an autism diagnosis, I would be dismissing a blessing of healing over my son. I worried that by accepting autism into our lives that I would look like a hypocrite for believing in healing. The past two years have shown me A LOT. And if it hasn't been made obvious in my writing up until now, everything was about ME and not about GOD. After this huge realization, the leaf came back to the tree it had fallen from, I turned my eyes to God.

What I hope to share with you in future posts is the journey we were on and were we go from here. There's a lot to be said to find another parent who is going through something similar as you at a time when one can feel the most alone. There is hope and life in sharing the ups and downs a parent faces when the reality of this world takes over. It is my hope that by being honest and sharing how I came from the thought of, 'if I accept autism, I loose a blessing' to 'it's been accepted and wow how the blessings have poured in so that I see the healing taking place before me'.

The other thought behind this is that in order for one to become better at what they do, one must practice. With that I will consider this outlet to practice my writer, to grow and learn how to be a better writer. With that, my hope is that you will enjoy the words I type onto this blog. When you read these words, may you see the Lord in them.

Many blessings to you! Until tomorrow.

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Info to Share

A few weeks ago, I shared Arron's story. I want to add some things to it...

The day before I had to meet with his speech therapist to talk about her initial evaluation of him, I was filled with all kinds of thoughts and emotions. I feared that she would bring up the dreaded "A" word or worst yet confirm my suppressed fear that he was autistic...

Now hear me out on this. I worked first hand for an after school program that was not special needs friendly. Our defensive for kicking out special needs children was that we were a "group orientated" environment and if the child could not be supported in a "group" then our program was not a fit for them. Over and over I sat in weekly meetings and hear my colleagues talk about the "autistic" kid or better yet, "that autistic kid's mom". The child was never referred to by name, no, only as the autistic kid and it was never in good conversation. I arranged for a special education teacher to come out a train our staff on autism and best practices for working with children with autism. Any way, case in point was that I saw how kids with autism were treated and it wasn't always good. So when I heard that Arron was showing autistic like characteristics, I died. I didn't want him to have something that would cause people to label him or judge him. Life is hard enough as it is, I didn't want something added to that to make life more of a burden for him.

So, not that you know where I stood, let me tell you where I stand. The night before meeting with the speech therapist I did something I had avoided like the flu. I googled autism...

I came across a website called Autism Speaks. I wish I had seen this website a long time ago. There are some signs that would indicate Arron as having autism. I didn't ball up an cry like I did when I first heard about him showing signs. I keep looking around the website. I found a tab labeled PDD-NOS, which is what the neurologist diagnosed Arron with two years ago, but is primary doctor changed to speech and social adaptive delay.

Here is where so much changed. I saw a video of a young college student named Kerry. I was blown away when I heard him speak, so much so that I cried. He was diagnosed with PDD-NOS when he was four and he is currently a graduate student and an advocate for those with autism. Two years ago the neurologist didn't give us much hope for Arron's future. When I saw Kerry talking so well and taking a stand to be a voice for others, I was given a tangible hope.

I'm not sure exactly what God is planning for Arron or for myself, but I trust that it is something great. You see a long while back, before this whole thing, I was walking to my car having come from one of my social work classes. I asked God, what will I be an advocate for? He responded, AUTISM. In my earthly way, I interpreted this as in the current moment and current situation I was in. So long story short, I changed the way people at work addressed children with autism and other things. Then here comes Arron's diagnosis. I fought this diagnosis with all that I had. Call it denial, but I refused for my son to have autism. I prayed day and night for God to work in Arron and I saw and still see God working in Arron. Then a few months ago I saw an episode of Extreme Makeover Home Edition where the family had a son with autism. This child was very talkative and functioned like a normal child. I felt the warmth of God embrace me and come over me with such a peace assuring me that it was okay to let someone say that Arron had autism. When I felt this I turned into a stubborn mule, shut off the TV and refused to accept what God was telling me. Now fast forward with me to today...

...So here is what I've come to understand...
the Word that has the ultimate life and truth is God's word and God's word promises that he makes all things work together for our good. I know that we live in a broken world and are susceptible to brokenness, but we don't have to stay living in brokenness. God will make us whole. I will walk in faith, trusting that God is always with us, He will never abandon us. I will go down this road that God is leading us down, I will stop being a stubborn mule. I see God at work in Arron everyday. I prayed that as we went down this road that God would put the right people, positive people, in our path. Believe me when I say that I didn't expect God to literally give me angels. One case manager that I talked to is named Gloria Angel and Arron's volunteer at basketball, well his name, can you guess?...ANGEL!

So what does Arron have? His official diagnosis is speech an social adaptive delay. I would agree that he shows some characteristics of autism and that working on those characteristics is helping.
Arron has quite a number of speech and social delays. His speech therapist also wants him to be evaluated by an occupational therapist to see if he may have sensory processing disorder, where there is a delay or over sensitivity to how his senses respond to the environment or stimuli. The things that the speech therapist has asked us to implement to help with Arron are working great. I see progress, in progress.

What I want you to know/understand about Arron:
  • He talks about Jesus...a lot
  • He started playing basketball today with Kinetic Kids and LOVED it
  • He understands you, but has a hard time making conversation
  • Sometimes we have to repeat directions to him or kindly get his attention
  • Love and Patience are greatly appreciated :-)
  • He has a HUGE heart and doesn't have a mean bone in his body
  • He is a very visual learner
  • He LOVES blueberries and strawberries as well as Pete the Cat
  • He gets really nervous in social situations
  • He gets nervous if he is in a loud place, so he'll cover his ears
  • He is a super smart dude
  • He is seeing a speech therapist and will soon be seeing an occupational therapist
  • He enjoys golf, music, playing with water, basketball and playing Tony Hawk on the 360
  • He is working on making eye contact with people
  • He falls under the category "special needs" or "child with a disability"
  • He doesn't know that he falls under the above mentioned category because we focus on his capabilities
Thank you for taking the time to read this, I had a lot to share. Please understand that I'm sharing a piece of my heart, which has undergone much transformation.

PS- If you have been considering a worthy charity to donate to, please look into Kinetic Kids. They offer scholarships for families who are unable to pay the full amount for the classes. We are thankful recipients of a scholarship. They believe in not turning away a child due to an inability to pay.

Saturday, June 9, 2012

A Look at Arron's World

My son Arron has found the camera feature on my phone. He'll grab my phone start shooting away. I appreciate the point of view/referrence for his pictures. After seeing how interested he is in taking pictures, I thought it might be cool to get him his own camera. I'd like to share some of his photography with you.

He took this picture of me driving, trying to figure my way around the Rio Grande Valley, from his booster seat in the back.

A side shot of his brother. Also from his booster in the backseat of my car.



A self potrait-the photographer himself wearing his daddy's sunglasses.

We were headed to Missouri for a board meeting with Axiom. After driving 8 hours, from San Antone, we stopped off at a hotel in Oklahoma. It was about 4am and we were popped...that is... until we got to our hotel room. We were wide awake and Arron grabbed the camera phone and started taking pictures. We were in a dark hotel room and the flash was too bright!!

Friday, June 8, 2012

Eye Contact

Arron had his initial evaluation with the speech therapist on Tuesday. Her main "assignment" for us was to work on Arron making eye contact. Since she pointed it out, I've been taking notice. He makes eye contact regularly with us. I've notice that it is with strangers that he tends to not make eye contact with.

The beauty in this assignment is that I've gotten to take a closer look into my son' beautiful eyes.
Arron has his daddy's long, full lashes that not all the mascara in the world could give me. When I was pregnant with him, I would act like I was taking his dad's eyelashes and give them to my belly. I love to look into those eyes and see the happiness and playfulness. I love looking into those eyes when he' exploring and seeing the amazement and wonder. I love looking into those eyes and seeing the hand of God at work in him.

To my Arron D., you are not what the world calls you to be, you are what God calls you to be. I trust that our Lord is calling you for great things. He is always faithful and will never abandon you.

Saturday, June 2, 2012

Case Management and Speech Thearpy

Last week we met with Arron' case manager. I am so thankful that she is a licensed social worker. We true social workers are not only trained in how to interact with people, but are typically "called" into the field. Our case manager is great! She made many referrals, one that I am so excited about is Kinetic Kids.  Kinetic Kids offers a variety of sports, musical and craft activities for kids with different abilities. They cool thing is that all classes are taught by occupational or physical therapists.

So since Arron has a speech and social adaptive delay, he's considered a child with "special needs". I've had to adjust to this new label, but understand it. I know that the ultimate labels are the ones that the Lord has placed upon us...

BELOVED SON/DAUGHTER
SAVED
FORGIVEN
HEALED

Our case manger referred us to a speech therapist (ST). I spoke with the ST and she sounds great. We have our first appointment on Tuesday. I will keep you posted on how that goes.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Our Life is Our Platform

Back in January a fellow believer prophesied over me. He told me many things and one thing stood out to me...he said that by the time my boys were middle school aged, that I would be speaking to people and changing lives. I've prayed about this since then. I asked God, what do I have to say that could change lives? His response was simple, "girl with  purpose". I felt this was His way of reassuring me that I don't have to worry about what I am going to say, but to rest in His purpose for me. I was talking about this with Luis and Ashley. I told them that I was ready and waiting for my platform. Luis told me not to wait for a platform, but to understand that our life is our platform.

I could have waited a very long time for a platform to come along, but that night I understood the significance of what Luis said. The life that we led in Christ gives us the opportunity to share Christ with others. When we look at ourselves and see the platform that is built upon Him, it's a wondrous thing. It's a true, unintimatding way to share Christ with others.

Here is my platform:

I'm a believer in Christ
I'm a wife, daughter, niece, cousin and friend
I'm a mom to two boys
I homeschool
I am in the process of setting up speech therapy for my five year old
I advocate for those that need it, whoever that might be
I love to take photographs
I enjoy cooking and baking and eating pizza
I write whenever the creative switch turns on
I love to scrapbook, but haven't had time to do in awhile
I understand the pain of losing a loved one and the hope of reuniting with them in heaven

In time, I will elaborate on each of these areas that make up my platform. My hope is to encourage maybe even inspire, but most importantly for Christ's love to shine through.

Many blessings!

Friday, May 25, 2012

Simplicity

Over the past two weeks I have been amazed by two things...

Pete the Cat I Love my White Shoes by Eric Litwin

Little Praise Party Happy Day Everyday www.yancynotnancy.com

My two boys love Pete the Cat and the music and videos from Yancy!! Let's just say that we had to go out and buy another Pete the Cat book because our first one became so worn in just a few days. As for Yancy's music...the boys learned all the songs in one day!! Everyone in the family knows them too and it's not uncommon for us to randomly start singing the songs.

Here's what amazes me so much about these two things...simplicity. Pete the Cat's story in simply told using a simple words. Yet after you finish reading, you want to read it again. Oh ya, and you find yourself singing, "I love my blue shoes" through out the day as well.

The same is true for the lyrics to Yancy's music. The lyrics are simple and straight forward, yet dynamic enough to create the warm fuzzies all over.

All this got me thinking about the simplicity of what it means to receive Jesus. Lately, I've heard people say that it's a sacrifice to follow Jesus and it will take a lot of work and dedication. Well here is the simplicity of it...it's not about your sacrifice, work or dedication, it's about Jesus' sacrifice,work and dedication to you. Jesus didn't come to burden you, he came to give you life. Luis explained this so clearly. He said that we receive Jesus the way we receive a gift. Typically a gift doesn't come with strings attached. Also,the person giving you the gift won't ask you to "commit your life" to their gift. So what am I getting at....we receive Jesus and his love for us and everything else simply follows. You begin to see His work in you, you begin to see how He is always faithful to you.

Do you worry about future sins or "falling off the wagon"? Are you thinking that you aren't "Christian" enough to receive Jesus? Well here's the beautiful thing...none of that matters. The only thing that matters is believing in what Jesus came to do for you...it's really that simple.

Be blessed and if you would like to be kept in prayer leave a comment or email me here